Friday, September 17, 2010

BSF---- All About The Ef-you-see-kay

It time for.......
One Crazy Brunette Chick

Today is brought to you by the word, FUCK.

There are many people that refuse to say the word fuck. Maybe they don't realise that there are very few words that have the versatility of "fuck". Besides its obvious sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations.

Because I fucking rock, I am going to show you how you can use this word in almost any situation.

As a greeting --- "How the fuck are you?"

Fraud ---"I was fucked by the Burger King Drive Through...AGAIN"

Dismay --- "Oh, fuck it."

Trouble ---"Well, I guess I'm fucked again."

Aggression ---"Fuck you!!!"

Disgust ---"Fuck me!!!"

Confusion, Curiosity or Disbelief ---"What the fuck....?"

Difficulty ---"I don't understand this fucking thing."

Despair --- "Fucked again."

Good Job -- "Congratufuckinglations."

Desperation ---"Fuckityfuckfuckfuck."

Incompetence ---"He fucks up everything."

Disappointment --- "This fucking fucker is fucked."

Intelligence ---"He's a fucking genius."

Dismissal ---"Why don't you go outside and play hide-and-go-fuck-yourself?"

Displeasure ---"What the fuck is going on?"

Lost ---"Where the fuck are we?"

Disbelief ---"Unbefuckinglievable!!!"

Retaliation ---"Up your fucking ass!!!"

Laziness ---"He's just a fuck-off."

Pain ---"Fuck ! that hurt."

Pleasure ---"Oooooooh Fuuuuuuck Yesssssssss"

Love ---"Do ya Fuck on first dates?"

Starting a relationship ---"Let's fuck now!"

Surprise ---"What the fucking hell was that?"

Admiration ---"Nice fucking tits!"

Stupid person ---"Dumbfuck!"

Hate ---"You Fucking asshole!"

Condemnation ---"Fuck that shit!"

Disappointment ---"That's not fucking fair."

A poker hand ---"A Royal Fuck."

Ignorant person ---"Fuckstick."

Denial ---"I didn't fucking do it."

Perplexity "I don't know fuck about it."

Apathy ---"Who gives a fuck" or "I don't give a fuck".

Confusion ---"What the fuck just happened?"

Resignation ---"Oh fuck it."

Suspicion ---"Who the fuck are you?"

Panic ---"Let's get the fuck out of here!"

Directions ---"Fuck off."

Sex ---"Let's fuck."

Maternal ---"Motherfucker."

Incestuous --"Motherfucker."

Ambiguity ---"I'm not so fucking sure."

Agreement ---"Absofuckinglutely."

Questioning Authority ---"Who the fuck do you think you are?"

Hypocrisy ---"Don't you dare fucking swear at me you fucking fucker."

Praising the Lord ---"Jesus Fucking Christ."

I have a headache ---"Go fuck yourself."

Refusal ---"Oh you can fuck right off."

Pissed off ---"Fuck the fucking fuckers!"

Be quiet ---"Shut the fuck up."

Ostentation ---"He's just bought a big, fuck-off Mercedes."

Sensuousness ---"She was wearing a pair of red leather, fuck-me shoes."

Confidence ---"Fuckin' A I'm right"

Rage ---"Motherfucking fuckers!"

Impressed ---"That was fucking amazing."

Oral sex after 20 years of marriage ---"Fuck you!" (while passing each other in the hall)

Bewilderment or Ignorance ---"Fuck if I know."

Threatening ---"I'm gonna fuck you up!"

Annoyance ---"Fuck off, kid, you bother me."

Annoyance ---"Oh for fuck's sake, what now?"

Pissed off ---"Fuck you, you fucking fuckwad."

Tardiness ---"It's ten-fucking-thirty already?"

Broken down car --"Sir, the fucking thing is a broken down piece of fucking shit."

Professional appraisal of mechanical failure ---"Yep, it's fucked."

Calling someone ---"Yo, fuck face!"

Minors ---"Fucklings."

Morons ---"Fucktards."

Completely naked ---"fucking Buck-ass naked"

Low intelligence---" Fuckwit"

A name for the penis-- Fuckstick (like "I'm going to jam my fuckstick right up your ass")

Thanks ---"Fuck you very much."

Some of the above are mine, and others I jacked from other places. Yes, I know this is a lazy post. Too fucking bad. My foot is swollen, I'm on painkillers, and my fingers are stiff because I'm fucking cold.

I'm living in my denial that summer is really over and refuse to turn the fucking heat on in September. (FUCK YOU Mother Nature)

I'll see you all back here on Sunday for more Drunken Bathtub Reflections.




PS...I found a new favorite blog. I you like the Royal Family's blogs, I think you'll like Green_Eyed Brat too. I think she is a long lost relative. No one can be that snarky and say fuck that many times without being related to us some how.
Go read her
The Green Eyed Brat

11 comments:

  1. Ever notice that the word fuck goes well naturally with other f words like fucking forever?

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  2. LMAO! I love it! I'm so using this!!

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  3. Disappointment is my favourite.

    Having a FUCKING awesome weekend.

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  4. Hope your toe is better. It is good to start your day with two gut busting posts. Thanks!

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  5. LMFAO! I use almost every single one of those fuckers!!!

    Here is one I use when my kids finally do something I tell them to:
    Halle-fucking-lujah!!!!

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  6. Loved the oral sex one. that was too fucking funny yet true.

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  7. I kept thinking I had one more to add, then I'd roll down a little further and there it would be. How very thorough of you... a true public service.

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  8. you fucking genuis...love your post.
    have a fantastic fucking friday!!

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  9. Jo, I know, riiight?! It's Fucking Fantastic!

    JoJo, I'm so glad you like it.

    Daft, I like Annoyance. Have a great fucking weekend yourself.

    Thanks Mike. My toe is fucked up, but it will heal.

    Brittney, Exactly.

    Dame Penis, I just may have to add that one!

    Dazee, soo true.

    Bluzdude, just doin' my part for humanity, yo!

    If, thank you, that's what I keep telling everyone! You have a phenominal fucking Friday too.

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  10. Wow! I've red your posts and I'm very flattered you made mention of mine. Thanks. Next round of drinks is on me bitch!

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