Only, it's no longer CB's. Our Royal Bartender, Jen , is now hosting Blog Stalk Friday. Get over there and give her some love. It takes big cajones to voluntarily step into CB's stilettos, and Jen is doing a great job.
So, I know I have been a slacker when it comes to blogging lately. I do have a good reason though...other than the drunk factor, you asshats.
I am intimidated. That's right folks, I, your Drunken Dutchess of All Things That Fucking Rock, is feeling almost unworthy.
Why, you ask?
Well, have you been reading the rest of the Royal Family? If you said no, you must live under a fucking rock. Check out my Royal family page for all of the links. Fuck, they are some funny bitches, and the funny just keeps on growing.
Our newest Royal is
I believe her Royal Name will be The Countess of Kick-Ass, but we are awaiting confirmation from the Queen.
Go read THIS over at the Queen's place. After you finish laughing your ass off, add her to your blogroll and follow her. I promise that little fucking brat will become your favorite Royal (other than me, of course). She is that good.
However, it's really motherfucking hard to be as great as they are every single goddamn day. My asshole blinking cursor mocks me on a daily basis. It even whispers, "Forget about it Dutch, your blogging mojo has left the building".
I hate that fucking cursor.
Know what else I hate? Insecure women.
If you think your SO is having a torrid fucking affair with a women
a. He never met in person
b. that lives at least 1000 miles away
c. who is extremely busy feeding gators and running the Family Brothel Business
d. while keeping tabs on the beer tab crown
e. AND is the head of a lovable, but out of their fucking gourd, Royal Family?
Get a goddamn grip, pull the stick out of your ass and take the dick out of your ear. You need several stiff drinks, and a mighty kick in the ass for being fucking stupid.
However, I must also say congratulations. You have been nominated for the Dumb Bitch of The Year Award. That makes you a special kind of stupid.
I like the new royal, but she is gonna have to work really hard to ever overtake you.
ReplyDeleteWe all bow down to you when it comes to the funny factor woman! Do you know how many times the Princess has called and asked..DID YOU READ WHAT YOUR SISTER WROTE TODAY?? or I call her and say.. GO READ WHAT YOUR DAMN AUNT HAS TO SAY..YOU WILL PEE YOURSELF!
ReplyDeletewhen it comes to the giggle snort factor.. you my dear sister...ARE THE QUEEN..
I BOW TO YOU..
Dutchess, you KNOW I have always thought you to be the best. Get that mojo back. No one can compare. No one else can make me laugh out loud. Love you!
ReplyDeleteSorry Dutchy! You are the main funny bone in this bunch! Some of my RL friends still quote you!
ReplyDeleteThey come over on Sundays and I read them Your bath time posts! It's awesome!
BTW love the new layout!!
No one makes me laugh like you do Dutch!
ReplyDeleteYou and me both sister...my brain has left the building! But even as nutty as I get I always try to look for you new posts...so keep posting. I think that crazy chic's paranoia is rubbing off LOL
ReplyDelete